The Free Show...To Play or Not To Play, That Is The Question...

So I'm back and I figured it was about time I put something here, It's been a while.....

A bit of a departure with this post and likely most future posts. I started this by telling stories of my past and my history with various bands over the years. I'll likely continue along those lines from time to time but I figured I'd try something different every now and then as well by just writing about other topics, still mostly to do with my experience as a small time local rock star.

Most musicians like to play live for an audience and I am no different in this respect. I live to entertain and I am rarely happier than when I am on stage doing what I do. I like to do it any chance I get. I have often said I would play anywhere, anytime for free, just because I like to play. I still believe this to be true. I did something this past week though that I have never done before and never thought I would ever do. I pulled out of a show with my band because we were not going to be paid for our performance. This goes against pretty much everything I have ever believed or said about being a musician and entertainer. I thought long and hard about it before pulling the plug and it hurt in no small way to do it. I felt however that it was my time to make a stand and stay true to myself. Luckily the rest of band are very understanding and supportive and while disappointed about not doing the show, they were on board with my decision.

I have played many free shows in the 20+ years that I've been doing this. I have played for free at charity events and just because I wanted to play. I have never had a problem with not being paid to play. I have even given other musicians grief about only playing for money. I've asked why just being able to play in front of an audience wasn't enough. I've gone off on long rants and had many animated discussions about not needing to paid for something I love to do. What, then, you ask, was my problem this time? I'll tell you....

The summer fair just took place here in Brandon. As is the tradition, local bands and musicians were called upon to play on the outdoor entertainment stage during it's run. I have played this stage many time over the years and enjoyed it every time. I have also been paid to do it every time. This year the fair organizers decided there was nothing "in the budget" for the local bands. Now, none of us local bands has ever gotten rich playing at the summer fair. It's never been huge money but there has always been something for us. Not this year. I was told that the fair was scaling back on the budget this year and there was simply nothing for the local bands. This would not have been that big of a deal if not for a few other details. Every other entertainer that was booked for the fair was paid. The stage hypnotist got paid. The lizard guy got paid. The high divers got paid. Doodles the friggin clown got paid. Every single one of them got paid to do what they do all week long. Not one local band was given one red cent for their performances though.

I was at the fair as a representative for one of their sponsors for the entire week. I was there every day, hosting and judging a battle of the bands for local bands and musicians. As a rule these contests don't pay anything to anyone other than the winner. That's cool. That's how they work. The fair did not, however put up anything for this contest. They left that to another local sponsor. This sponsor was put in charge of organising the contest as well as booking the other talent to play every night outside of the contest. The sponsor was also left to come up with the prize for the contest. All of this was done at the request of the fair and at little to no cost to the fair because....there was nothing in the budget.

As a rep for a sponsor I was invited to a VIP meet and greet on the opening night of the fair. At this event I got to listen to a nice speech from one of the people in charge about how great the fair was. How successful it's been over the years and how much money it makes for the community. I was also privy to what kind of money is generated for the fair itself though vendor fees etc. I then got to witness the largest and most extravagant fireworks display the fair has ever put on. Overall it a great big self congratulatory high five for how great the fair is. But there was nothing in the budget of this hugely successful, award winning, money making extravaganza for local talent. Does anyone else see something odd here?

Basically what it all came down to was this. Local bands were not paid for their performances because the people who organize the fair did not think we were worth paying. Again, every other entertainer who was working at the fair this past week got paid for their work. Local bands have always been paid in the past but this year we were not worth it. If you don't think local talent is worth anything why bother asking them to come and play? Obviously we're worth something or we wouldn't be asked back every year. Not this year though. Nothing in the budget.

I have played many free shows over the years and I will continue to do so. I will never go back to play at the fair though. Even if they decide I'm worth paying again. I play for free because I like to play. I enjoy helping out a worthy cause with charity gigs. I like sharing the stage with other talent and just "getting the music out there". I do not enjoy playing for free just because someone has decided I'm not worth paying. I'd be willing to bet that would hold true for anyone doing something they love to do. You may love your job but if your employer decided you weren't worth paying would you still do it? Your employer certainly feels that you are good enough to keep around. They want you to do your job, they just don't think you're worth paying for it. Would you still want to do your job for them? I think not. That's why I didn't play the fair this year. Not because I wasn't being paid. Because I wasn't thought to be worth paying. In the end I did something I've never done and hopefully never will again but I felt that it was better than going along with the idea that my talent and effort were worthless. No one should ever be made to feel worthless for any reason. I took a stand and missed an opportunity to do something I dearly love to do, but I'm OK with it.

Wow! Three Years?!?!?!?

OK so I haven't posted anything in a little more than 3 years. Three years!!?!?!?!?!?!?!? I had no idea I had neglected this space for so long. I'm sure the three people on the planet who had been following my writings have long since given up and moved on. Can't say as I blame them, I pretty much did the same thing. I'm back though. I'm going to try to do this a lot more regularly from here on out. At least one post per year if possible............

Tagged! Musically this time...

Mama D has tagged me again. This time a meme (I have no idea what that means) with a musical theme. Seven songs that I am currently enjoying. I can do that....

1 - "Talk To Her" - Priestess - Fantastic new Canadian hard rock band. I love these guys!
2 - "Level" - The Raconteurs - Great song. It sticks in my head and I find myself singing it to myself all day.
3 - "Freya" - The Sword - Stoner/Doom metal. I discovered this band while playing Guitar Hero 2 and had to get the album right away. They rock!
4 - "Heat Of The Moment" - Asia - Cheesy '80s Prog Pop, but I love it.
5 - "King Of Rock" - Run DMC - Not many people know how much I love the old school Rap kings. But love them I do. This song is a particular favourite.
6 - "Heart Full Of Black" - The Burning Brides - More great undiscovered rock and roll. I love the Internet for just this reason. It's so easy to find great new bands that I'd probably never hear otherwise.
7 - "The Devil Cried" - Black Sabbath - Just saw them in Wpg last week-end. One of the best shows I've seen in a long, long time. The mighty Sabbath are still the kings of true Metal.

I'm supposed to tag 7 more people with this but I don't know that many people who blog. Mama D has already hit up anyone I could think of anyway so, there you go.

I do it all for the chicks....(hysterical laughter)

There are many reasons why someone might get into playing music. Fame, fortune, artistic expression, boredom etc. I'd like to say I got into it for any of those reasons but truth be told...I got into it to attract women. This is NOT the reason I continue to do it and has not been for a very long time but when I first started out I was young and stupid and not very successful with the ladies and I thought, "What the hell? This is my ticket to heretofore unreached heights of sexual prowess. I am going to be a singer in a rock and roll band and get all of the attention I can handle from the fairer sex." Actually it was more like "Hey I might be able to score if I do this so let's rock!" This plan went array very quickly and I had to come up with a better reason early on. Now it's all about entertainment and I am serious about that, no jokes. I live to entertain people and singing in the band is the best way I can do that. But in the beginning....

Even with my fool proof plan for "getting some" I can count on one hand (finger actually) the number of times I actually succeeded in getting some attention from an attractive female fan. It happened at the mecca for local cover bands back in the day, The Carberry Motor Inn., and it was not exactly as I hoped it would be. The girl was very nice looking. Great smile, beautiful eyes, and a fantastic body. She had been dancing in front of the stage during the entire first set, making direct eye contact with me and giving me the most expressive "looks". I could tell by the way she looked at me and from her body language that she was interested in me. It was VERY difficult for me stay focused on what I was doing and I'm sure I messed up more than a couple songs. I was thinking "Finally! This is what I got into this for. I'm gonna score!". After the set I went to the bar for a beer and noticed that my admirer was standing by the sound board talking to one our crew guys. I summoned up all of the "coolness" I could and went over to them. Our light man introduced us and being a gentleman I extended my hand. She took hold of it and looked me directly in the eye with that coy expression that to me said "Take me I'm yours." I was in heaven. I tried to make small talk and get to know her a little but she just held my hand and smiled at me while never breaking eye contact. A little strange but so far I was hooked. At that moment I would've given this girl anything she wanted and been happy to do it. My mind was racing with all sorts of impure thoughts. When it came time to go back for the second set I politely tried to excuse myself but she held my hand firmly and pulled me closer to her. She kissed me lightly on the cheek and licked my earlobe. She then looked me in the eyes again and I got the very distinct impression that after our last set I was going to Heaven.

The second set went very much like the first with my dream girl dancing in front of me more seductively than before and giving me "the look" for the entire set. The rest of the guys had noticed her as well and started to laugh and make little comments to me between songs. Our light man especially seemed to be very entertained by the whole situation. The break between our second and third sets went very much like the first. She didn't talk much but the looks she gave me said everything I wanted to hear anyway. I was on cloud nine. Just before we went back for our last set of the night our light guy leaned over and whispered to me "Be careful man, she's nuts...so is her husband" Whoa, husband? I could deal with her being a little crazy. It might even turn out to be a good thing, but a crazy husband I was not prepared for. The third set was much like the first two. More dancing, more sultry looks and then things went to hell. A very large and angry looking man came into the bar and straight up to the dance floor and grabbed hold of my fantasy playmate's arm. She looked at me then at him and she stopped smiling. He looked at me and was not smiling either. I continued doing what I was doing but a concerted effort to not look at her or even in her direction. The angry fellow started yelling at my number one fan and the two of them began walking towards the exit. She turned back to look at me once more with that expression and he gave me a look that said only one thing, pain. I looked away from them and finished the set.

At the end of the night I was told by our light man to head straight up to the hotel room and the rest of the guys would be up right away. The look on his face said "Don't take your time, get the hell upstairs, fast!" So that's what I did. I was sitting in the room having a beer and feeling both disappointed and afraid. When the guys came in I almost jumped out the window until I realized it was not the angry husband or the hot girl. My fan and her husband had left I was told and then our light man gave me the whole story. He had known the girl for a long time and her husband as well. He had just gotten out of jail where he had been serving time for a rather violent assault. He was also known to carry a shotgun in the trunk of his car. She was known to be a rather trampy tart who got her kicks out of making her angry husband jealous. She was known to cheat rather voraciously while he had been locked up and on occasion while he was not. He had gone to jail for beating one of her conquests quite badly. I was of course feeling relieved that nothing had actually happened and that I had escaped any sort of violence. I was also quite disappointed that I was NOT going to score after all. I was a little hurt that I was just being used to piss of her husband but not hurt enough to think that I wouldn't have gone through with it if I was sure that I could have gotten away with it. I was young and stupid after all. Not to mention horny and desperate.

After that incident I was much more careful about how I interacted with the female contingent at our shows. I've also had a girl friend for most of the time while I was in different bands and of course I'm now married to the greatest girl ever and cheating is not something that I've ever been interested in. I'll talk to girls at our shows and I'm not above a little innocent flirting but that's where it ends now. I still wonder sometimes what would have happened if the angry husband had not entered the picture. That was the one and only time my "Do it for the chicks" philosophy was ever given any credibility at all in the last 17 years or so. I did have a girlfriend who apparently only stayed with me because of the band and the fact that I pissed off her parents but that's it. That was enough though. There are much better reasons to do what I do now. Beer, mostly.

Fun Times at the Carberry Motor Inn

Back in the day....I think it was a Tuesday....the Carberry Motor Inn (aka the CMI) was pretty much our home base. Lagerhead played at this venue more than anywhere else. It was the site of our very first "professional" gig, ie: the first place that actually paid us to come out and play. We made a whopping $45 each that week-end and could not have been happier. Some of my fondest memories from those halcyon days of care free rock and roll spirit come from the beloved CMI.

Our very first gig in Oct 92 was also the first time the CMI had booked a live band in something like five years. We were honoured and did our best to put on a good show. I think we accomplished that task and then some as, like I said, we went back many times after that. Not only were we the first band they had had in a long time but that night also saw the occurrence of the first real bar fight the establishment had had to deal with in quite some time as well. We were right in the middle of a blistering version of "Sin City" by AC/DC when I looked over to my left by the pool table and saw one man being rather severely beaten by three others. Two guys had him pinned to the door to the beer room while a third was hitting him repeatedly in the face with the butt end of a pool cue. I calmly suggested to anyone who was listening that someone should help the poor guy. It appeared that no-one was listening as the beating continued. After a couple more pleas for assistance the bartender finally looked up and noticed what was happening, then calmly went back to serving drinks. Enter the Meaterman. Meats, our light man extraordinaire, stood approximately 6.5 feet tall and weighed in at a slim, trim 300+ lbs. He made sure the stage was well lit and left his post at the back of the bar to see what he could do. What he could do was pick smaller men up by the back of their necks and throw them around like rag dolls. He started with the guy wielding the cue and when the other two realised what was happening they let go of their victim and ran out of the bar. By this time the bartender had decided that everyone at the bar could wait a few seconds and quickly ran over and attempted to forcibly remove Meats from the bar. The previously mentioned victim was in pretty rough shape but still managed to convince the oblivious bar tender that our guy had in fact saved him and not started any of the violence that had taken place. The guy with the pool cue had also fled the scene by this time and our new friend was taken to get medical attention and we continued on with our show. At the end of the night we commended the Meat man on a job well done and berated the bartender for not having a clue what was going on. The bar owner had been made aware of the situation and also commended both us , for not stopping our show, and Meats for getting the job done when it needed to be. All this excitement on just the first night of our two night stand!

Saturday night rolls around and we make our way to the bar for our first set. There had been a decent sized crowd the night before and we were expecting the same for this night. We come down the stairs from our hotel rooms and enter the bar to be greeted by....two people other than the staff. It seems that Carberry is a hockey town not unlike a lot of small towns around Manitoba, and there is a game on tonight. Great. We'll play to these two people and deal with it. What choice did we have? We started out the set feeling a little dejected. Playing live is always a lot of fun and in fact it's something I live for but playing to really small, unappreciative crowds can be taxing, not to mention a huge blow to the rock star ego. Big crowds who are into the show are very cool to play for. I feed off the energy from the crowd and in turn amp up my performance in kind. We had resigned ourselves to the fact that this night was going to be essentially a paid practice so we weren't trying very hard. Just going through the motions basically. Then something rather strange occurred. The two people in the bar moved to a table right up in front of the stage. They clapped and cheered loudly for every song. They danced in the aisle next to their table. They were enjoying our admittedly lacklustre performance. We were inspired to say the least. We started to return their enthusiasm in kind and ended up playing to those two people as if they were 2000 people. I was using a wireless mic and so I left the stage and joined our audience out front. I sang directly to them, danced with them and generally ran around the bar like a mad man. This inspired a the other guys in the band and by the end of our first set we were all dancing on tables and running around the room having a great time. During our break we sat down and had a couple drinks with our audience of two and passed the time chatting and thanking them while a few more people wandered into the bar. We played our next set with just as mush enthusiasm as the first to a little larger crowd of around 10 or so and went back up to our rooms during our next break to just mellow a little before finishing the night.

Flash forward about half an hour and we make our return to the bar. Apparently the hockey game was over by this time and the local team had won. The place was absolutely packed to the rafters with a lot of happy people when we came back in. We literally had to push our way through the crowd to get to the stage. Our friends from set one were still right up front and most of my performance that set was directed at them. We were having a blast. This was, as I mentioned earlier, our very first bar gig and I was thinking "I hope every show goes like this!" At one point during the set I was sort of lost in the moment and singing with my eyes closed during a particularly emotional part of whatever song we were playing at the time. I opened my eyes to the sight of the two bartenders and a waitress (apparently extra staff was brought in after the previous nights mayhem) running past the stage with fire extinguishers. Hmmm, I thought, this can't be good. We finished the song we were playing and took a quick inventory to make sure none of our gear was on fire. It turned out that someone had set a paper towel dispenser in the men's room alight. Smoke was billowing out of the room and down the hall, filling the bar until someone opened the back door, allowing the noxious cloud to dissipate. With everything under control we finished our set. Taking time to notice that the WAY TOO FREAKIN BIG PA SYSTEM we had brought along had been cranked up loud enough that we were actually rattling plaster off of the ceiling in various places around the bar. Ahh Rock and Roll. Louder is always better and no one but us seemed to notice that the place was falling apart around them. We ended up renting this particular PA system pretty much every time we went out and it was always way more powerful than what we ever needed.

At the end of the night we were sitting with the staff while they took a break before finishing the closing process. Doors were all locked and everyone but us was out of the bar. We were casually shooting the breeze when the bar owner came in and joined us. He looked around and noticed a few spots were there was an awful lot of dust and chunks of ceiling on the floor and looked kinda pissed. He asked the staff if there was anymore trouble like the night before and they told him of the fire. He inquired about the plaster everywhere and we admitted that we might have been a little loud but the staff defended us saying that the place was absolutely packed and the volume was not overly excessive at all. They then proceeded to tell him about the way we performed for the two people that were there at the beginning of the night. This impressed him and he opened a case of beer and we all sat around drinking for free until the very wee hours of the early morning. He also paid us $22 more than the agreed upon rate because he felt we deserved it for making the effort to entertain his patrons. Fee beer and more money! We were living the rock and roll dream for sure. As I mentioned earlier we made a grand total of about $45 each after expenses that week-end. If the bar owner had not paid us extra I'm sure we would have come home owing money to someone. Like I said, that PA was WAY TOO FREAKIN BIG for the places we played. Way too expensive too. This whole week end was just the beginning of our long term relationship with the beloved CMI. More stories from this hallowed ground next time....

Crime and Nudity in Portage La Prairie MB

It's been a while and I promised a friend that I'd post something last week-end so...better late than never.

It has been said that rock and roll musicians are of a somewhat criminal nature. I don't know who exactly said it but I have heard it said. It is a general misconception that most of us are criminals and we'd all be in jail if we weren't playing in bands. This was never really the case with any of the bands I've played in. Some former bandmates have done time but the criminal element was never directly connected to the band until one fateful week-end in Portage La Prairie.

The week-end started off innocently enough. We were unaware that a hardened criminal was in our midst until approximately five minutes after we arrived at the venue. Our sound tech, making his first venture out with us, was arrested within in minutes of getting out of the vehicle for the horrible, terrible, unspeakable crime of........JAYWALKING!! Yes that's right, jaywalking. We had no idea the guy was that dangerous. We knew him from high school and a band he had played in were friends of ours so we took a chance and brought him along to work the sound board for us. If we had known his potential for crimes of this nature we may have thought different but we didn't. It seems that he had developed a rather ravenous appetite on the hour long journey from home to Portage. Upon our arrival he noticed a fast food place across the street from where we were playing a set off immediately to satisfy his hunger....for CRIME! With reckless disregard for the law he crossed the street and was quickly apprehended by the local constabulary on the other side. We were in shock! How could we have let a criminal of this nature into our little group? How did we not know of his dangerous criminal ways? He was written up for his dastardly deed and handed a fine that pretty much took care of any money he was going to make during his tenure with us that week-end. He was then escorted back across the street to rejoin us as we loaded into the venue, denied the sustenance that he sought! Still hungry and now broke he grumbled something under his breath relating to the intelligence of a certain farm animal and was duly warned to keep his ideas to himself or there would be more trouble with the law. We assured the officer that he would not be of any further problem and proceeded to mock him mercilessly for the remainder of the week-end. That's what friends do for each other. Even though it was apparent that he was indeed a dangerous criminal, he was still our friend and it was our duty to make fun of him at every opportunity.

His mood was changed drastically however when it was discovered that we were not the only entertainment scheduled for the week-end at this particular venue. It seems that the bar we were playing in was also a "Gentleman's Club". As we were loading in we could not help but notice a completely nude woman writhing about the dance floor on a blanket as is the custom of "exotic dancers" when reaching the third song of their set. More than a little surprised, and not a little bit excited, we were informed that, should we so desire, we would be providing the music the live nude girls would be, ahem, dancing to this evening. This was of course fine by us and we continued setting up on the stage while the dancer finished her set and came to talk to us about our song selection etc. After getting things set up and ready to go we went upstairs to our rooms and were surprised and delighted to find the dancer form downstairs was right next door. We knew this because she was wandering the hall, still completely nude and completely oblivious to the fact that we were all staring. We chatted a little and decided on what we would play for her later on as well as the other girl who was dancing that night, whom we had not yet met and would not until we took to the stage for her next set in approximately half an hour.

Half an hour later we were back in the bar and onstage waiting impatiently for the second dancer to make her appearance. The house DJ got on the mic and gave her the usual "alright gentlemen please welcome to the stage insert cheesy stripper name here" sort of intro. We then started into our first song as agreed upon earlier and the dancer made her entrance. She was not quite as attractive as the first girl we met and very obviously high or drunk or both. She did not have a great body either. Far be it from me to criticize anyone based on their body shape but if you are going to take your clothes off for a living you should at least try to take care of yourself. I would not call her fat or ugly but she was also not exactly svelte and beautiful either. Definitely not in the same class as the first girl we met. She gave me a wink and a smile and then proceeded to ignore us for the rest of her three song set. Unlike most exotic dancers I've seen she was completely nude before the first song was finished. She was also far more attractive while fully clothed. She spent the next two songs begging the guys up front to throw loonies at her and would then proceed to bend over and pick them up in all manner of not overly enticing ways. Between her badly sagging breasts, using her tongue (eww, licking the dancefloor and putting coins in your mouth are likely NOT the healthiest choices one can make) and using other, rather interesting if not repulsive techniques. At eh end of our third song the DJ asked for a round of applause for her and she picked up her clothes and left the bar. She didn't even acknowledge us or thank us at all. No worries, we didn't really want to talk to her anyway. We grabbed a drink and waited for the other girl to come down for her next set. As a "featured dancer" she was a lot more classy than the first girl. Better looking, better body, cleaner and more entertaining. She also acknowleged us, played to us and thanked us for playing for her at the end. All around she was a much nicer person and better dancer than the first girl. She also spent a lot of time wandering around the hotel completely nude, which was certainly appreciated by us. I apologized for staring while sharing a beer with her back in one of the rooms and she told me if she didn't want us to look, she'd get dressed. We chatted about the various things dancers and musicians have in common when it comes to being on the road and life in general. We were both entertainers after all. She was a genuinely nice person and it was cool to hang out with her. Her being gorgeous and naked may have skewed my views a little though I'll admit. The two of them did not get along with each other very well and basically avoided each other most of the time. Nice girl was doing what she did because she genuinely enjoyed it and had fun while making a good living at the same time. Not nice girl was the typical jaded drug addict who had to be out of her head to perform and felt bad about herself but did it anyway. I've always said that if you don't like what you're doing, you should stop. If the second girl had the same attitude and personality of the first girl then it wouldn't matter that she wasn't the most attractive dancer on the circuit. She would become more appealing and entertaining just by virtue of having a good time with it. I've said that the same applies to live music as well. Even the crappiest, most untalented band can be very entertaining if they are having a good time while onstage. The opposite is also true. A fantastically talented band who don't look like their enjoying themselves will almost always suck live. If the entertainer is having fun, be it dancing around nude or playing music, then the audience will have fun too. Especially if the audience is also a band who happens to be playing for a hot stripper who smiles a lot and likes to be nude off stage as well.

With Great Power...

First off a disclaimer:

"The opinions expressed on this Blog are those of the Blogger and no one else. These events are the way he remembers them and never embellished for the sake of entertainment. Any potheads who remember things differently should lighten up (or light up) and get over themselves."

Moving right along.

We now return to Boissevain. Man, that week-end was just chock full of great stories. The stage in this particular bar was quite small. Basically we used it as a drum riser and set up the rest of the band on the floor in front of the stage. This is not uncommon but it can have it's drawbacks. Being so close to the action is not necessarily a good thing. People generally tend to step on things and bump into you while you're performing. This can be more than a little distracting. If a fight breaks out on the dancefloor, two feet in front of you, it's more than a little difficult to keep your focus. Also if the band is on the same level as the pool tables and some guy just cranked his shot way too hard it can be distracting. The cue ball comes rolling up to the "stage" in the middle of a particularly rocking song. I spied it but still had to work to avoid stepping on it and hurting myself or those around me. I'm a big man and when I go down I go down hard, more often than not I'll take someone else with me too. I managed to avoid the wayward orb and finished the song without incident. In the midst of the cheering and applause I hear "Can I have the ball back!". I say "Pardon" and again I hear a request to return the cueball. I let the guy know that I was a "little busy" at the moment and that if he wanted the ball back he'd have to come and get it. He did so and was none too pleased to be dragged away from his table to get it. I suggested maybe he should be more careful with his toys, not all of the neighbours are as understanding as me when the ball comes into their yard. He grunted some derogatory remark and I handed the ball to him but did not let go. He looked at me and I said "Say thank you". He replied with a different turn of phrase that did end with "you" but did not begin with "thank". I took the ball back and put it next to drum kit on the actual stage. I started to intro the next song when he again, loudly and more rudely this time, demanded the ball back. I again asked for a polite thank you. He was getting quite angry now. Not so much because I was holding the cueball for ransom but because I was embarrassing him in front of everyone. Pretty much everyone in the bar was laughing, including the guys he was playing pool with. He muttered a quiet than you in a very snotty and sarcastic tone and I said "Pardon". This time I held the mic out for him and he said "Thank you" again. This time with a little smile.
"You're welcome" I said and handed back his ball. He went back to his game and we continued our show. Afterwards I bought him a beer and apologized for messing with him in front of everyone. He was cool about it and we chatted for a while until the next set.

Being very close to the audience also has it's benefits. We are rocking out during our next set and the dancefloor is packed. Tons of people having a good time with the band. The dancefloor has a bracing pole from floor to ceiling pretty much right in the middle. I spy a rather fetching young lass drunkenly using the pole while she's dancing, not unlike a stripper might. Hmm I thought, where can I go with this? The next song is the ZZ Top classic "La Grange". There is very little singing in this one so during the extended guitar solo I usually go to the bar and get another beer, check out the sound in front of the band and mingle with the crowd for a few minutes. This time I had other ideas however. I decided that if the lovely young lady was going to make believe she was a stripper I would try to help her fulfill her fantasy. I started talking to her through the mic. I complimented her on her skills and her looks. She smiled coyly and laughed. I, of course, began to "egg her on" as they say. I started a chant of "Take it off" and made sure I got the whole crowd involved. She just kept looking me in the eye and giving me the "sexy stare" as I like to call it. She was getting in to it in a big way. I love the effect that alcohol and peer pressure can have on some women. (Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those guys. I just found the whole thing very entertaining and really it was pretty harmless fun). The first item of clothing to come off was her sweater. It came up over her head and was tossed away without a care. Next she unbuttoned her jeans and pulled the zipper down just enough to expose her underwear. Pink. I was getting g into this whole thing a little more by now as well and really wanted to see how much further I get her to go. The crowd was cheering her on and she looked like she was having a blast. She started teasing with her shirt. She'd pull it up a little to reveal her belly and then back down. Then up a little more to reveal that her bra did indeed match her underwear, then back down again. She pushed her jeans down to her hips and started lifting her shirt again. A little higher, a little higher. It's up over her head now, the crowd is going nuts. The guys in the band have extended this part of the song even more than usual and everyone is having a great time. Everyone except her boyfriend. Just as she was pulling her shirt off, he came up with her sweater and covered her up again and pulled her off the dance floor. Denied! the crowd starts booing him and she looks back with a shrug and a look of slight disappointment on her face. I mention that we were only having a little fun and that he should consider himself lucky as his girlfriend is hot! We finish the song and then the set and I go looking for the couple to see if things need to be smoothed over. I couldn't find them any where. Apparently they had left right after her performance was cut short. I talked to a couple of people who knew her and they assured me that I had not gotten her into any trouble. They told me that the couple would probably be back to thank me for adding a little "spice" to their evening. The boyfriend would probably thank me after he went home and enjoyed the "fruits of my labours" if you know what I mean. They were back the next night and everything was cool. They had indeed used the show as the starting point for a very enjoyable evening at home so I was told. I said I was glad I could help out and if they wanted to repeat the performance I would be more than happy to oblige. She had apparently sobered up however and was not so sure she wanted to do it all again. No worries. It was just good to know that I had that kind of power. I can use my God given rock and roll superpowers to make rednecks apologize for their rudeness and I can make hot girls take their clothes off in public. I love playing in a Rock an Roll band!